Saturday, November 6, 2010

My wonderful world!

I think we're finally getting into the swing of things around here. Sylvester is wonderful, I love having him home! Breastfeeding is going great, he's eating every 4-6 hours and he breastfeeds for about 15 minutes on each side, plus burping and what not. He's such a good baby! I can't believe how amazingly calm he is 99% of the time. He's still sleeps a lot, but even when he's awake he's generally quiet and wide eyed. He loves watching TV, lol.

There's been a few hiccups, like he decides to scream from 11pm until 12am for no apparent reason. He's only done this a few times, but I really feel horrible when he does because I know something is wrong and I can't figure out what it is. We finally put him in the bed between us last night and he slept like a dream until 4am when he woke up to breastfeed, and then he slept in the swing for a while longer, then we moved him to the bassinet. We went and bought a motorized swing the first night he did this, thinking he needed that comfort of motion and it works most of the time but I think he's growing tired of it now. Or he just wants a change occasionally, he slept in the bassinet this morning, he's sleeping in the swing now, hopefully he'll be ok with switching back and forth. I don't want him to ONLY be able to sleep when he's being swung, that'll be a pain when he gets older!

In other news, I'm getting together stuff and patterns to make things to sell online. I'm not sure I'll actually make any money off of it but it gives me something to do which is keeping me sane.. at least more sane. I'm still emotional but far less, which is wonderful. I feel like I can finally breathe, unlike last weekend where I felt smothered. And not smothered because I didn't want to be a Mom or didn't want to be with Sylvester, but I just felt overwhelmed, was doubting myself big time and generally I was just feeling lonely. I felt very much like a "single parent." With Sly going to school full time and working full time, he's here in the evenings but that's about it. And don't take it the wrong way, I don't blame him at all, but I miss him and I miss him being here with us. I think a lot of the issue was lack of sleep, I was so far behind on sleep and then I didn't want to sleep because everytime I'd lay down I'd start thinking and get even more depressed. But finally I forced (and Sly forced) myself to sleep and that helped a ton. But speaking of sleeping, I'm going to try to catch a nap while Sylvester is. Then I'm going to get up and do some crocheting on a friends baby-shower gifts, and then baby some stuff to sell online!

My whole world revolves around these two people.